Milk and Honey Magazine explains how to become a strong woman - the woman you've always wanted to be!

Becoming Strong Women

Nicole Kennedy

I rediscovered an old book called “The Book of Me” from when I was six years old.

Illustrated in the style of Dr. Seuss, the book contains a variety of miscellaneous questions, everything from “how many freckles do you have?” to “what do you want to be when you grow up?”

According to my answers, six-year-old me had one freckle (false) and dreamed of becoming an artist (true, but ill-advised based on my drawings throughout the book). Now, sixteen years later, it’s fun to read my old responses and see how much I’ve changed.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I’m not talking about your post-grad career goals or your 5-year plan. I’m talking about you. Maybe you consider yourself “grown up” already; you have a stable job, a place to live, and a network of friends. In reality, though, whether you’re six or sixteen or sixty, you’re still in the process of building your reputation and discovering your identity.

When people talk about you, what do you want them to say? What will you do each day to glorify and reflect Jesus to the world? Here are three steps for becoming the woman you’ve always wanted to be, for manifesting qualities that will deepen throughout your whole life.


It’s time for some soul-searching! The first step towards self-development is identifying the areas in which you want to grow. Find a quiet place to think, like a comfy chair in your house or a serene hiking trail where you can walk.

Read the Bible, search for passages that inspire you (Galatians 15:22 and Proverbs 31 are great), and pray for God to speak to you. Take note of ideas that come to mind; words like “patience,” phrases like “she opens her arms to the poor.” This is also a good opportunity to talk to friends and loved ones.

Prepare yourself to receive honest feedback and to use it constructively.


Now is the time to turn your ideas and convictions into a plan of action.

If your word is “gentleness,” brainstorm ideas of how you can become a more patient person, like doing the dishes for your roommate while she’s hard at work.

If your goal is to care more for the less-fortunate, find local soup kitchens or homeless shelters that need volunteers. Turning abstract objectives into concrete actions is where many people fall short in achieving their dreams, but with the right plan of action, you can accomplish everything you set out to do.


Even once you have a plan of action, it’s easy to let your goals fall by the wayside throughout the course of your busy life. Share with a mentor, trusted friend, or pastor about what you want to accomplish. Ask this person to pray for you regularly and check in with you from time to time.

Having a system of accountability is incredibly powerful; it’s a big part of why programs like AA are so effective. You’ll be more motivated to follow through with goals, and as a bonus, your relationship will strengthen at the same time.

Above all, remember that you are a remarkable daughter of God, created in His image to do powerful things. If He has placed a desire or conviction in your heart, pursue it enthusiastically and deliberately.

With clear goals, accountability partners, and lots of prayer, God can shape you into the amazing woman you’ve always dreamed of becoming.