I'm Not Ashamed

I'm Not Ashamed is an upcoming 2016 drama film based on the journals of Rachel Scott, the first victim of the 1999 Columbine High School massacre in Columbine, Colorado. Although the tragedy was obviously somber and dark, young Rachel's faith shed light on the truth of Jesus's love, peace, and sovereignty. Milk and Honey Magazine was lucky enough to interview Taylor Kalupa, a gorgeous actress who played Gabby in the film!

Grab a pumpkin spice latte, some warm slippers, and let's have a fireside chat with the gorgeous Taylor (in blue above and below) for an inside look on the latest blockbuster hit - in theaters everywhere October 21st, 2016!

Who is your character?

I play one of Rachel Scott’s best friends. My character’s name is Gabby and if I had to describe her, I would say she’s kind of like the Karen (from Mean Girls) of the girl group. Gabby definitely has her blonde moments and I’d like to say my character provides a lot of the comedic relief in the film.  

How are you similar/different than your character?

Well for one, I’d like to say that I have a good sense of humor. I make my friends and family laugh… and at the very least I make myself laugh! I also have my fair share of blonde moments. But other than that, I would say I am very different from Gabby. I’m a nerd at heart, and I am also very against being mean to other people and bullying. I was bullied by other girls pretty badly when I was younger and in competitive dance. I have always believed in standing up for the underdog and being kind to everyone no matter what they look like, how they dress, where they come from, or what they do. People might find it ironic that I really enjoy playing mean girl characters; however, I see it as a way to shed light on such situations and bring awareness to bullying. 

What was it like behind the scenes while shooting?

Working on this set was so much fun! We filmed in Nashville, TN, and it was my first time there. The area was beautiful and fun to explore. It was definitely hot though! We filmed in July & August, so I’m sure you can imagine! The humidity and heat mixture was a bit of a shock for this California girl, but by the time I left, I actually ended up liking it. Now, I go back and forth to the Southeast all the time for work and I love the weather. But back to filming – being on set was a mixture of lots of fun and definitely lots of emotions. We had some of Rachel’s family on set, they had her actual car shipped to Nashville to use in the scenes where she is driving and in the memorial scene, we had her actual journals, backpack, and clothes on set. These aspects made it emotional, but also lit a fire in us to really tell this story the best that we could. Every single person who worked on this film was not only amazingly talented and kind, they were also dedicated to telling Rachel's story. We all became a family and, in a way, Rachel was right there with us throughout the whole process. 

Were many of the actors Christian in real life?

Yes, a majority of the actors in this film are Christians. However, it wasn’t a requirement to be a Christian to be in the film. I believe God just orchestrated things so that many of us were. One of the executive producers, Benny Proffitt, began each day on set with a group prayer, praying that God would use us to tell Rachel’s story the way that God wanted it to be to told. We all knew the importance and duty in correctly telling this story because of the potiential it has to impact the world. However, even though most of the cast and crew were Christians, not every single person was. There were some actors and crew members who weren’t; but, regardless of their beliefs, they were still just as dedicated to working on the film and telling Rachel’s story. The thing I loved about being on the set, and that I think is very similar to the way the movie plays out, is that Christianity was not pushed on anyone or preached at anyone on the set. The attitude while filming and the way in which Rachel’s story is told in the movie is very similar to her line “I just want to live my life for Jesus and let others take whatever they want from that.” Reminds me of a quote that the superintendant at my elementary school, Dr. Tim Burlingame, would constantly say to us at the beginning of the school day “Go be Jesus to someone today. We might be the only example of Jesus someone has in their life.”

How did shooting the movie impact your faith?

Rachel was only a teenager. She struggled with her faith just like we all do. When she was shot, she was a young Christian and was still growing and struggling in her walk with the Lord. She stood up in front of her class and shared her faith with her fellow students; however she never pushed her beliefs or faith onto them. All of these factors alone have impacted my faith because I hope to be like Rachel in these regards. The most impactful part though is realizing she was only 17 years old and yet she was bold with her faith and she refused to deny God.

Did you work with Sadie Robertson?

I didn’t get to meet Sadie while filming. It’s funny because I was there in Nashville for almost an entire month filming and one of my only days off was the day Sadie filmed all her scenes. Sadie plays Rachel’s cousin who lives in Louisiana and my character lives in Littleton, CO so we didn’t have any scenes together. However, I was just in Nashville for the red carpet premiere for I’m Not Ashamed and I got the chance to meet her there. She is a sweetheart and I’m really happy that she, her mom, and her sister wanted to be a part of the movie.

Did you get to meet any of Rachel’s family in real life?

I did! I got to spend some time with Rachel’s mother Beth Nimmo, which was so special. She is such an amazing woman – so kind and strong. I will never be able to imagine what it was like to go through what she did; I think it’s absolutely incredible the way she trusted all of the filmmakers and actors with her daughter’s story. I also recently got to meet Rachel’s sisters, Bethannee and Dana, at the premiere. We had been friends on facebook and corresponded back and forth via social media so it was so wonderful to finally get to meet them in person. They are both such sweethearts.

What was it like working with Director Brian Baugh?

Brian is phenomenal. You might already know his work from his film To Save A Life (if you haven’t seen it, then you’re missing out). He is a really talented director who makes being on set fun and rewarding. He collaborates with the actors and makes us feel confident in having a creative voice and gives us room to explore, while still guiding us in the right direction to make sure the story is told. He puts his whole heart into whatever project he is working on which is evident in the final product. I hope that I will get the chance to work with him again in the future because I trust his vision for whatever movie he works on.

Who do you think should go see the movie?

I definitely think this is a film that everyone should see, regardless of religious beliefs. Rachel was a Christian, yes, and this is a faith based film; however, it is a true story and the script literally comes directly from her personal journals and eye witness accounts. I don’t think that because Rachel was a Christian that should limit the audience. She was an incredible girl and I think her story deserves to be seen and appreciated. Everyone knows about Columbine. This movie gives further insight into what happened. Rachel lost her life that day because she wouldn’t deny what she believed in and I think that everyone, regardless of their religious beliefs, can learn from her.

AND of course, I also think this is a very important film for Christians to see. With the world events today and Christians being persecuted more and more, Rachel’s example has never been more relevant than it is now. It shows that Rachel wasn’t a perfect girl. She struggled with the same things all of us struggle with –self-worth, temptations, etc. – however, God still used her to make a huge difference in the world. At 8 years old, Rachel wrote on the back of her dresser in an outline of her hands “these hands belong to Rachel Joy Scott and will one day touch millions of people’s hearts.” I think it’s amazing to see how God turned such a tragic situation in which Rachel was martyred at Columbine, into one of hope because He is using her example and story to touch millions of people and bring them to Christ.

What was your favorite scene to shoot?

This is a tough one because I loved a lot of the scenes. The prom scene was awesome; they fully decorated this huge beautiful warehouse in Nashville and went all out with 90’s decorations and music. I had been to a prom in high school, but I didn’t actually get to go to my own senior prom because I had booked a modeling job on the same day. So in a way, getting to go to this prom was almost like making up for that. All of the high school scenes were fun at the school---- But my favorite scene of all was the memorial scene. It was the last day of filming for a lot of the actors including me so it was already an emotional day. When Rachel died, her car was left parked in the school parking lot. Her classmates and friends and family all gathered at her car and placed flowers on it as a memorial to her. We recreated this using her actual car. Let me just say, it wasn’t hard at all to step into the emotional state of what my character would be feeling. I remember touching the car and the tears just began to flow. It was a beautiful and touching scene to film and because everyone had become like a family on set, we all felt safe enough to share those emotions and be vulnerable.

What was the biggest takeaway from shooting the movie?

Working on I'm Not Ashamed changed my life. I remember getting the initial audition notice and researching Rachel's story and instantly knowing in my gut that I had to get a role in the film. I prayed that I would be able to be a part of such an incredible story, and God answered those prayers by blessing me with my favorite project to work on so far. Getting to hold her journals in my hand, meet her mom Beth, and play one of her best friends were all such privileges and periodically brought tears to my eyes. I left set with an amazing gift that I credit to Rachel.... I no longer stress or worry about the everyday occurrences or the future because I trust that God's plan is much bigger than my own. Rachel constantly wrote in her journals that she wanted to change the world and that she wanted the world to know her name so that she could share her faith with others --- God has changed millions of lives with Rachel’s story. I think the biggest takeaway is that God doesn’t always work exactly how we expect him to do things; but He is in control and His plan will exceed our own.

Are you still keeping in touch with some of your co-stars?

Oh, yeah! We all became such good friends, which I think was the second biggest takeaway from the film. I believe the friendships and bonds we made on this set will last a lifetime. Some of the actors are now my best friends and again, everyone I worked with on the set feels more like family than co-workers.

What’s next for you? Any upcoming projects?

I have some things coming up that I am really excited about. I’m about to go to Atlanta to film an episode of a TV show that is the true story about Kari Swenson, the world class biathlete, who was abducted by two mountain men (father and son) in Montana and held captive with the plan to make her the son’s wife. It’s going be intense, but also a lot of fun because I haven’t filmed any roles where I’ve been kidnapped and held captive yet so it’s going to be a fun challenge. I also am slated to begin filming a movie called The Pastor in early 2017, in which I play the lead female role. My character is Grace who is a young female cop which is going to be very different from the roles I usually play so I’m very excited for that. Other actors attached to the project are Kevin Sorbo, T.C. Stallings, and Hector Echavarria, as well as Cameron McKendry who plays Alex in I’m Not Ashamed. Cameron has become one of my best friends so I’m really looking forward to getting to be on set with him again. I also have a few other projects in the works and a network television show I booked, but none of those projects can be disclosed at this time. I’m just thankful that I am able to do what I love and grateful to be working in such a difficult and competitive industry.

I'm Not Ashamed comes to theaters everywhere on October 21, 2016.